Wednesday 29 December 2010

Identify his/her place and yours.


When a lovely friend of mine started complaning about feeling distanced from me, it didn´t make sense to me because it´s a relationship which I treasure but after pondering over the entire episode, (I still don´t agree that someone can intentionally withdraw from a wonderful and exceptional relationship just for the heck of it...but) I could understand the feeling.
After pondering the whole situation, I came to the conclusion that there are always two major people in our lives at any one given period:
People who come into our lives to teach us, to help bring us insights into different lives´ lessons thus making us better people.
And people who come into our lives to learn from and of us, to be blessed of God by us and to become better people because of us.
I discovered that if we do not identify each set of people and their places in our lives, the aim can never be achieved and we end up hurt, dissappointed and full of complaints about other people.
How do you teach a man and how do you learn of another? The first and most important thing is to have a meek spirit, a teachable heart and a generous and giving spirit.
The one sent to teach you could be anyone; it could be a 2years old kid, your boss, your childhood friend, the tattered and unkempt looking young man you met on your way home from the mall, it could be that next door neighbour who is soooo nosy and such a gossip, it could the old lady sitting next to you in the bus, it could the drunk who just hit your car ... it could be anyone and they can walk into or out of your life anytime, they may as well have been in your life and then suddenly, it´s their turn to teach you. Sometimes, roles might suddendly be reversed and it will be you doing the teaching, giving the lessons and the blessings.
How prepared are you to identify these people, identify their different roles at different times and do what you ought to do?
We ought to be ready to give as much as to recieve.
I´ve learnt that teaching and giving others makes us wiser, stronger and did I mention that it cuases our tents to grow even wider, but recieving from others makes us more humble as well as teaching us to be more giving. So you see, these two people are completely and entirely entwined, one cannot exist without the other, there wont be a giver unless there´s a reciever and without the learner, the teacher will never be heard of.
There should never be any idle person in our lives at any time nor should we allow ourselves to be just another empty vessel in the lives of anyone.
Let us therefore wisely identify the places of different people in our lives as well as identify what we´ve been sent to do in the lives of others around us. Let us ensure that our lives are surrounded by worthy and productive people and that we continually enrich the lives of others.
This way, you take a whole load of unreal and unrealistic expectations off your relationships and enjoy the gift of family and warm friendships.
This way, you won´t overburden the people in your life with demands that they be or do things they weren´t meant to be or do.
This way you leave out complaining and whinning out of your relationships.
This way you understand that people come into your life for different reasons.
This way you appreaciate everyone that walks into your life.
This way you learn to let the people whose jobs are done move on to someone and someplace else, and you learn to hold on to those who still haven´t fulfilled their jobs.
This way you love and value every single person whom, you´ve ever had the honour and the previliedge of knowing.
This way, you leave a great mark in the lives of everyone who come in contact with you and your life will be blessed and enriched by the impact of others.
That way your life is made fuller and more beautiful.
Along the line, I recieved this wonderful massage from another wonderful friend...
People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that
person..
When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty,
to provide you with guidance and support,
To aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.
Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die.
Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done and now it is time to move on.
Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.

What more can I say?
Let us love one another unconditionally.
Let us give of ourself and of all that we have been so graciously given.
Let us humbly learn to recieve of Him who wants and provides only the best for us at all times.
Let us be vessels unto honour and blessings in the lives of everyone that come into contact with us.
Let our lives be testimonies that goodwill, kindness and tenderness is still possible and that it is completely free and available.