Tuesday, 18 November 2014

How To Build Your Self Confidence And Keep It.

Continuing our conversation on increasing your self confidence, we will look at 3 more guaranteed actions that will boost your confidence in yourself.
If you missed the others, you can read them here and here.
  • Be kind and generous. Being kind to others, giving of yourself and giving a helping hand to the person who needs it has a magical effect on us. It provides you with an opportunity to bless the life of another and gives you a feel-good-about-yourself feeling that can not be easily taken from you. Giving and contributing to the success of others will not only help you feel better about yourself, but karma will reward you in the end. After all, it is said that we do reap what we sow. Kindness and generous acts will always find their way back to you. 
  • Be both grateful and thankful for what you have. A lot of the times, at the root of insecurity and lack of confidence is a feeling of not having enough of something, whether it's emotional validation, opportunities or material things. But, it is irrefutable that just the mere act of acknowledging and appreciating what you do have, can help you keep the feeling of being incomplete and unsatisfied at bay. And, subsequently, this will bring with it an inner peace that will do wonders for your confidence. Gratitude and thankfulness will keep you both humble and elated. So, as you continue on your walk take some time to sit and think about all of the things you have going for you, no matter how mundane you think those might be.
  • Surround yourself with positive relationships. My Mum always used the popular saying, "Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are". Cliché, you might say, but it is true that being around people who support, compliment, encourage, and generally validate you will open your eyes to the good in you. It will boost you and help you solidify a sense of self-affirmation in you and this will directly increase your self-confidence. Identify people with positive, uplifting outlook and attitude towards life and whose standards are kinder and more realistic, and when you do, spend time with them.Identify those people that exhibit the confidence and qualities that you desire to possess. Become friends with those people who are positive, empowering, and want to see you succeed. 

  • On the flip side of this one, stay away from negative people. Get rid of as many sources of negativity as you can. You might argue that we can't get rid of every possible source of negativity in our lives, but, we can certainly make an effort to cut down on exposure to that negativity. So, do yourself a favour, keep far from you everything that might bring you down. Disengage yourself from mean and toxic friends. Choose to spend less time with people who are nervous perfectionists, unkind or unsupportive of your dreams or goals. Cut them loose. Stop reading or watching anything that even remotely makes you second guess your self-worth. 
And, if there is any part of your life or situation that you can't change immediately, then change the way you handle it.
I will end this post with a word from Mark Twain. "Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. (Or you, your achievements and your dreams.) Small people do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great", he said. Words in bracket are mine.
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